Blood Vs Water Cast Is Bloody Awful!

So it's official. The Survivor casting department is definitely on cocaine!  Once again, I am truly shocked by the turnips they're bringing back. The only one I'm really looking forward to seeing back is Laura Morret. I've been campaiging for her to come back for a while. She should of been brought back in Heroe's Vs Villains but I'm sure they would afraid of her spoiling Russell's game.
I will say that the concept of having past players compete against their loved ones sounds very interesting even though I am so sick of returning players. But this cast is nothing short of atrocious. I thought it was bad when they brought back a last place contestant last season. This time they've managed to top themselves by not only bringing back a last place contestant but a total of four players who failed to make the jury the last time they played!
Fucking Tyson?! Even though he is a huge villain he is no all star and had no business coming back a second time let alone three times. He proved himself to be a total moron by handing the game over to Russell the last time he played. Then there's Tina who only won by riding Colbey's coattails in Australia and Colbey being too um... honorable to vote her off and go to the end with Keith which would of guaranteed him the win. Then of course she came back, again for no explicable reason, and finished dead last. I will say, however that the other two pre jury castaways Colton and Monica are a lot more desirable then most of the cast.
Apparently they had a really hard time finding a minority to bring back so they went with fucking Gervais from all the way back to Season 1. If they needed a minority so bad they should of brought back Peigei from China! Not only is she a minority she's also a lot cuter then Gervais. Or Ozzy for that matter. Dawson from Phillipines would of been really good also. I would of even rather of seen Sabrina from One world come back then fucking Gervais!
Speaking of One World, Probst has said that the reason they've been doing so many seasons with returning players is because the last one they did with all new players was One World which was not well recieved by audiences. So guess which season has the most returning players coming back this season? That's right! Fucking One World with a wopping three people from that season! In addition to Monica and Colton they are actually bringing back the brain cell challenged Kat.
I remember when Kat got voted out (moments after saying how fun blindsides were) and was in tears claiming how she was going to beg Probst to give her another chance so she could redeem herself. I thought to myself, "better not hold your breath, there's no way they will ever let you're dumbass come back!" Next thing you know they'll bring back Erik from Micronesia. Wooops. I forgot. They already brought his dumbass back.
We also got Aurus from Exile Island who has the distiction of being the winner with the most votes cast against him. We also got fucking Rupert coming back for the fourth time with his wife who according to this video is even more annoying then he is. Then we got RC from Phillipines. I'm not too upset with her coming back.  At least she's hot, but I think there would of been a lot more entertaining players they could of brought back from her season. Like I said I would of liked to of seen Dawson come back but even more than her I would of loved to of seen Jeff Kent or Pete come back.
All I can say is I hope Laura or at least her daughter kicks these idiots asses.

Survivor Caramoan Finale Recap: Revenge of the Nerds!

I've said it before and I'll say it again.  Survivor is like pizza and sex.  Even when it's bad it's still pretty good.  This season and this finale definitely proved that.  I would of been happy with three of the final five members winning but unfortunately it was not to be.
Although not a great one as far as Survivor finales go, it does start off with a lot of excitement but also a lot of disappointment when Erik, one of my three picks, collapses immediately after last week's vote.  And I do mean IMMEDIATELY!  It doesn't even take place after a long hike back to camp but happens right after the tribe is exiting tribal council.  Medical comes in and determines he's severely dehydrated and malnourished.  Thanks Brandon.  You took away your tribes food supply and now your best buddy is at death's door. (Of course I'm STILL wondering what happened to all that rice and beans that Andrea won!)
The doctor is able to administer an IV on sight.  After Erik asks what this will do something even more shocking happens.  Probably the most shocking event of the entire season when village idiot Eddie gives a very clear and articulate explanation of what's happening with Erik and how the IV will benefit him. 
Probst asks for a verdict as to whether Erik can stay in the game.  Unfortunately the doctor says Erik's condition is so severe he need to be hospitalized immediately.  It's no surprise when John and Dawn waist no time to clamor for Erik's vote.  I've never seen such a phoney and disgusting display of manipulation and fake displays of affection.  Dawn is like "I love you!  Blah blah", then she snatches Erik's bag so she can hand it to him while he's being whisked away by the van, however she doesn't go into full crybaby mode and for once holds back a major meltdown.
I have to say I'm a little disappointed in Erik.  It's obvious he was in a lot of pain but I can't imagine there would be any amount of pain that would keep me out of the game at any stage but ESPECIALLY at the final five!  If I'm conscious and that close to the end they would have to literally drag me kicking and screaming.  However, Erik does no such thing and he ends up finishing fifth place just like he did last time and just like last time he goes out with a very good chance of winning had he been able to make it just a couple more days.
So now we're down to two "favorites" and two fans, two guys, two girls and it would seem that the game is now Eddie's to lose.  There is now just one more immunity challenge left and out of the other three his biggest competition is probably Dawn.  John realizes this and makes a bee line for Eddie to negotiate a deal as soon as they get back to camp.  Of course it's one he has no intention of honoring should he be put in that position.
At the reward Probst calls the players in and Dawn and everyone else have somehow managed to get over the tragedy of losing Erik and come in smiling ear to ear, fake teeth and all!  The challenge is a redo of the last immunity challenge that Ozzy won during his Survivor career.  This happened in Dawn and John's season but they were out of the game at that point so they have no advantage of experience with the challenge.  In case you forgot you have to build a tower of cards while holding onto a pully that is connected to the base of the cards.  However, this challenge is not for immunity like in South Pacific.  Like the last "reward" challenge last season this challenge is for a chance to win and advantage in the final immunity challenge.  Boy they're really gettin desperate on the kinds of twists they add to a season.  This one is so lame.  I also really miss the days when castaways got to play for a car.
The challenge itself is pretty riveting.  I've never seen a challenge go back and forth so many times in Survivor history.  At one point Eddie is just inches from winning, which would almost certainly result in a spot in the final three and probably the title of sole survivor.  Unfortunately he loses concentration (what a shock) and knocks over his tower.  Both Dawn and Sherri come close to winning a few times as well but Sherri in particular is so nervous she can't make it to the finish line.  After all the times John knocks over his tower I'm fairly certain he's not winning this but to my surprise he pulls himself together and does indeed win the challenge.  Naturally, as soon as he wins Dawn rushes over to him and congratulates him to try to stay in his good graces.  Of course I'm sure she was being totally sincere and NEVER would of done that if Sherri or Eddie had won the challenge!
After the challenge were subjected to John once again bragging about what a great challenge beast he is.  Then amazingly we suddenly stop seeing John being buddy buddy with Eddie.  Then something even more amazing happens when it becomes clear that the final four are completely oblivious to just how hated Dawn is by the jury.  I'm not surprised that Dawn fails to realize this but Sherri and John not seeing this is very unexpected.  Now suddenly Sherri and Eddie are buddy after a month of hating each other. 
Dawn of course is completely paranoid about being voted out.  She pleads to John for his assurances.  To her face he completely reassures her but in private he's implying that he might want to cut her loose, which I really can't understand.  That would be like wanting to cut Russell loose at the final five.
On day 38 the tribe gets tree mail that informs them of the impending right of passage of fallen comrades which will be followed by the final immunity challenge.  There are some pretty amusing remarks by the four during this stage.  We hear Sherri say how Shamar was "misunderstood".  Ok.  Then we hear Dawn accusing Brandon of letting his personal life affect his game too much.  Alrighty then.  Reminds me of when Brandon's uncle was crying about getting lied to.  Then we hear Matt give the incredibly insightful remark that Survivor is one of the hardest games there is.  Gee thanks a lot.  I never knew Survivor was a hard game.  Hard to believe such an insightful braniac failed to make it to the merge!  Then John talks about how grateful he is to of been under Phillips "tutelage" and I really want to smack John.  Then we get a soundbite from Phillip where he takes one last opportunity to swoon over his idol Boston Rob!
At the end we hear Eddie boasting about how he is ready really bring it home at the challenge despite John's advantage, because he's done so great in individual challenges so far this season.  The challenge consists of running up a three story tower and retrieving three bags that are tied up and contain puzzle pieces.  They must then propel themselves down a slide and when they have all three bags they must untie them and form a puzzle that's in the shape of a flame.  Before the challenge begins John's advantage is revealed which is having bags that are already untied. 
Naturaly John is the first to start on his puzzle but the rest of the pack aren't far behind.  Eddie really needs to win this but unfortunately the fireman is more accustomed to destroying fires rather than creating them and he doesn't even come close, even if its just a depiction of a fire.  Both Dawn and Sherri actually pull ahead of John at first but then, just like the last challenge John pulls it together and is able to win the challenge.  Watch out John!  If you're not careful you're going to be knocked over by Dawn who is rushing over to you for a very disingenuous congratulatory hug!
The odds are really against Eddie now but he gives it the old college try to plead his case to vote out Dawn.  Although his case is weak he actually does a pretty good job with his argument.  Sherri has nothing to worry about because John is convinced she can't win.  The question is does she still want Dawn out and is she willing to force a tie if John isn't convinced of that strategy.
At tribal Dawn talks about how Eddie is a huge threat because he hasn't pissed anyone off.  Probst gives Eddie the opportunity to retort and Eddie is like "duhhhhh".  With a little more prodding by Probst he finally gets an actual sentence of out Einstein, who agrees with Dawn that the jury doesn't hate him but probably don't respect his game since he only voted out one person.  Remarkably he never mentions the deal John made with him.
Predictably, John and everybody else play it smart and vote out Eddie.  Naturally, as soon as this happens, Dawn jumps up, hugs Eddie and tells him how much she's gonna miss him.  I'm sure.  What's interesting about this is Sherri's vote.  She was very vocal about her apprehension in going against Dawn in the final three, although I have no idea why.  I'm guessing John realized long before tribal council that Eddie was too dangerous to bring to the end and probably warned her against voting for Dawn.  In his confessional Eddie states that Sherri has a zero percent chance of winning so it's painfully obvious that John is going to win. 
Never the less we have to still go through the motions of the day 39 breakfast and preparing for the final tribal.  Reflecting on her chances of winning Dawn states that's there a part of her that thinks she doesn't deserve to do good.  Well that's at least a little reassuring.  At least Dawn is completely evil if there's a part of her that realizes she is in fact a total scumbag.
At the final tribal, Dawn is the first to give her opening statement.  She seems enormously proud of herself and is completely unaware of cold stares she's receiving from the jury.  She tries to defend her behavior in the game by saying since Survivor is football she had to be willing to tackle.  Survivor IS football?  I was never aware that Survivor IS football.  Go figure.  I guess you learn something new everyday.
Sherri is next and is so nervous she just starts babbling complete nonsense which includes talking about how well off financially she is, making it more and more obvious that John has this in the bag, even though he is also very nervous and like Sherri he verbalizes this.  It's hard to believe he was never told in Harvard Law School to never say you're nervous when speaking in public and you should fake it until you make it.  However, he gives the most logical opening and all of his answers are also very logical and persuasive.  They're also complete horseshit in a lot of cases.  He tells Malcolm that he was able to make it to the end because he's so much more insecure than Malcolm and he assures Eddie that he will be happy to share a beer at the bar with the amigos after the game.  Of course he doesn't tell them how just a few weeks earlier he was saying how he would never want to engage in any kind of tom foolery with those muscle heads.  John is a big fan of the game and knows what kind of questions are typically asked.  I'm pretty sure he planned on giving that insecurity answer to any of the amigos who might ask it.
The jury is of course, very hard on Dawn, although there not as damaging as the heroes vs villains jury was to Russell which was a disappointment.  She consistently says how she was just playing the game when she betrayed people who were strategic threats, but I would of loved to have heard someone ask her how she would of felt had John decided to do that to her. 
The two best are Reynold and Brenda.  I've been waiting and waiting and waiting for someone to call Dawn out on being such a phony and Reynold hits it right on the head.  He talks about her always being the first one to give an over emphatic hug and to say "that's hilarious" when someone makes a joke but she's not even laughing, which I thought was very observant. 
As Reynold is telling her this Dawn is acting completely shocked by these accusations and claims she has no idea she is the least bit phony.  I think up until this point Dawn believed, and maybe still does, that she's perceived by everyone to be this incredibly noble and caring person.  While there probably are a few dimwits out there that think this, or maybe I should say "thought" but of course it isn't true.  I'm pretty amazed that Dawn can't see Reynold's point but the funny thing is I think she was being sincere when she claimed ignorance of this character flaw she has.  To me, this is just further proof of just how truly insane Dawn actually is.
Micheal seems to be a little bit more sympathetic to Dawn.  He asks John if he thinks all the heat she's getting is warranted.  John dodges a strait answer by saying he doesn't know, but he's happy to see so much venom directed towards Dawn. Of course he wasn't asked what he knows he was asked what he thinks so it would of been nice if John had actually answered what he thought instead of saying he didn't know.  Upon hearing this Dawn gives a very sarcstic "thanks Cochran" like she's surprise he would be happy that the jury hates her.

Then of course, there's Brenda and they save the best for last.  First she gets Dawn to admit that she would not of actually quit the game like she claimed if Brenda had not found her teeth, then Brenda demands Dawn prove it by taking her teeth out and letting everyone see her the way Brenda saw her that day.  At first she refuses but quickly flip flops and says she'll be "happy to humiliate herself" for Brenda and actually does it!  We then get a great money shot of Dawn flashing her tooth challenged smile.  I don't know why Dawn did this.  It should of been clear to her at this point that she had no chance of winning so she had nothing to gain by doing so.
The backlash Dawn received was no surprise but I was very surprised by how hard Sherri was attacked by the jury.  Malcolm basically tells her there's no way she's getting his vote.  Phillip excommunicates her from Stealth R Us, while Erik and Eddie both accuse her of doing nothing.  I think this was very unfair of the jury.  I will admit that that "paybacks a bitch" comment she made after Corrine got voted out was really dumb, but Sherri was put into an impossible situation at the merge.  Her original tribe was outnumbered 2 to 1 and everyone on her original tribe hated her. 
The fact that she made it to the final three is nothing short of a miracle!  I'm sure if you went up to Erik or Eddie or Malcolm and asked them what chance someone would have who was in that situation, of making it to the final three they probably would of answered that that person would have to play the game of a lifetime to make it to the final three.  It would of been extremely stupid of Sherri to try and make some big strategic moves right after the merge.  She did the smart thing and wormed herself into the majority alliance and then made a strong sub alliance with John and Dawn.  I was really hoping Sherri would win this game and I believe she's much more deserving than John.  Maybe she did some really stupid mistakes in her interactions with the jury that we never saw but I just don't get the hatred that is directed at her.  I think in the case of Phillip he probably made some advances toward her and was rebuffed so he is very bitter about that. 
So John wins and he wins by unanimous decision.  This is pretty shocking.  Given the fact that he betrayed all the same people Dawn did and with his inherent hatred of Alpha males which made up about half the jury, it would seem Sherri should of been able to win this, but she doesn't get a single vote, which unfortunately means Dawn gets to tie her for second place. 
How did this happen? 
Well, the first time John played, most of the cast were really annoyed by his eccentric personality.  For some reason everybody this season seemed to find it very endearing.  Never in all my years of watching this show have I ever seen a game fall into place so perfectly for one person.  He was never in danger of being voted off.  His tribe dominated before the merge than at the swap even though his tribe lost every challenge he had the numbers to stay safe.  Then after the merge he always had the numbers.  So John becomes only the second male to win a season that featured returning players.  He's still a nerd though.

Survivor Caramoan Episode 13 Recap: Cruelest Blindside Ever!

Tonight's episode will probably go down as the most heartbreaking episode ever!  It was so emotional, that for the first time in 26 seasons, even Probst was brought to tears at one point.  However, I think a valuable lesson was learned and it can finally be established that if you ever go on to Survivor, NEVER, under any circumstances do you win the reward for the loved ones visit!  Doing so puts a huge target on your back!  Let's look at the last five winners of this challenge.  Mike, Ozzy, Kat, Malcolm and now Brenda.  In each case, each person was voted out the moment they were not safe.  Even when they give up their reward like Mike, Ozzy and Brenda did!  It doesn't matter!  If you win the loved ones reward the only way you're making it to the end is if you have immunity for the rest the game.  Like Fabio did in Nicaragua.  For the record Mike wasn't actually voted out but that's only because he had already been voted out when he won the reward.  But had he won the final redemption island duel he almost certainly would of been voted out the moment he was vulnerable.  It doesn't make any sense to me.  Even though I agree with John that at that point likability is a liability, I just don't see how people can be so cold blooded.
Oh well, let's start from the beginning of tonight's episode.  The day after tribal, John is talking with Eddie about what will happen next.  Eddie knows he's got his back against the wall.  When John asks him who he thinks will go home if Eddie wins immunity, Eddie tells him the group will probably go after him.  This stuns John because after all as he says he is so nonthreatening!  Wait a minute.  Wasn't John boasting just a few weeks ago about how he was the greatest challenge threat in the Caramoan and he was going to keep winning and winning.  Of course since then he hasn't come close to winning a challenge.
For once Eddie might actually be right, because Brenda is plotting with Dawn to take out John.  After finding Dawn's teeth a couple episodes ago she still feels completely bonded to her.  Dawn however is conflicted.  Imagine that!
Meanwhile Erik is really starting to lose it.  He claims to be starving which is odd since Andrea just won them a shit load of food two episodes ago.  But he is fixated on this gigantic coconut tree and hears them laughing at him.  That's right.  Apparently the Phillipies have laughing coconuts.  I can't believe that's never made the news.  Anyway Erik is so desperate he tries to climb the tree which appears to be about a thousand feet high, despite the warnings of Dawn and other tribe mates.  He doesn't make it though but lucky for him he doesn't fall off and crack his head either.
Dawn makes it whole five minutes into the episode this week without crying but when Eddie brings in tree mail which promises a visit by loved ones she of course loses it after giving Eddie a huge hug and kiss.  As always there's a sprint phone with video teasers from each players loved one.  Upon watching these we learn that John is apparently demanding to be called by his last name even to people outside of the game because his mom addresses him as "Cochran" in her teaser.  I wonder if Jeff Probt's mom calls him Probst?
At the challenge the survivors are reunited with their loved ones and for once Dawn isn't the only one crying.  Probst actually gets choked up at seeing the love between Brenda and her dad. 
The challenge consists of unspinning three poles, hanging them on a rack, then flinging three ropes at the poles.  Brenda and Erik are competing hard, as usual Sherri is completely irrelevant but John is actually playing it smart and obviously holding back because he's watched enough Survivor to know how dangerous it is to win this challenge.  Not that he had a chance with his senior citizen mom.  Oooops I just said something about John's mom, guess he's gonna come after me now, because that's practically what he threatens to do to Probst when he accurately reports on Mrs. Cochran's lackluster performance.  Probst actually backs down and tries to redeem himself by complimenting Mrs. Cochran for looking so good for her age.  Sickening.  I'll never understand why Probst has such a huge mancrush on John!  Sometimes I think he likes John more than Boston Rob.
Brenda wins the challenge and is told to pick one person to join her.  I'm surprised to see Eddie begging Brenda to pick him.  Did he actually think he stood a chance?  Unsurprisingly she picks
Dawn "for so many reasons"!  Now I'm sure most people have the perception that this phase of the game is done out of compassion by the producers but in reality it's a method of creating a lot of drama on the show and fucking someone over.  This season though they really up the stakes when after Brenda picks Dawn and is told there is a huge barbeque waiting for them, she is given a horrific dilemma.  First she is told that everyone has a SECOND loved one waiting to see them, then she is told she can either choose one other person to join her and Dawn to visit their loved ones or she can sacrifice her and Dawns visit and let the four remaining players visit both of their loved ones.  This causes Sherri to have a bigger meltdown then Lisa Whelchel had last season, as she collapses to the ground and starts crying harder than Dawn. 
This is why you should never try to win this challenge.  First of all the winner is going to piss someone off and even if you don't win you have a very good chance of still enjoying the reward when you're either chosen to join the winner or the winner is given the choice of forfeiting their visit.  But if you forfeit it usually doesn't carry any weight whatsoever with the remaining players like in Survivor Amazon when Matt gave up his visit and only one person that he was so generous to voted for him to win the million.  Often they just see you as a threat and want to get rid of you because you're now so likable.  Well, Brenda chooses to give up her reward, which of course causes Dawn to start blubbering worse than she has the entire season.  Even worse then when she lost her teeth!   
Brenda was pretty much screwed the moment she won this challenge but I think she could of played this a lot better a couple different ways.  She could of put the heat on Dawn and asked her to decide what to do.  She could of chose another person to come with her, that way it's a lot more even.  I might of made a counter offer to Probst and asked if I could give up my visit but still have the food.  If he would of said no I would said "sorry, I'm really starving".  At least that way it looks like you made an attempt to be more generous. 
To add insult to injury the reward takes place just 50 yards from camp on a floating barge.  At the reward John is going on and on about his Dad's amazing ability to ummm, flip burgers.  Yeah that's so impressive.  To make it even worse the crowd is shouting out to the beach how they're not missing out on anything.
At camp Dawn is acting like a spoiled brad, as she's pouting and breaking bamboo and slamming things around.  My heart really goes out to Brenda as she tries her best to comfort Dawn, but she does nothing but lash out at Brenda.  This must of been one of the most uncomfortable days for any Survivor.  Dawn has got to be the most immature person to ever play this game.  As bad as I feel for Brenda I feel even worse for Dawn's husband.  I can only imagine the hell it must be to be married to this lunatic.
The immunity challenge is a redo of one from One World where participants must hang unto a rope as they are facing down towards the water.  Every so often Probst lowers them further towards the water.  Mr. Challenge king, John is once again the first one out.  Followed by Eddie than Erik.  Sherri soon follows which leaves the only two people who didn't get to visit their loved ones.  Although we didn't exactly see them enjoying any of the barbeque, we did see a shot of the rewardees carrying what appeared to be left overs to Dawn and Brenda so it's not like they had the disadvantage of an empty stomach. 
Dawn pleads with Brenda to drop out and offers to share the immunity with her.  That's odd.  I've been watching Survivor for 26 seasons and I never knew you could "share" individual immunity.  Brenda, however, declines the offer.  Somehow Dawn wins the challenge though.  It's not really clear if Brenda let her win or if Dawn actually beat her.  She seems to imply that she did let her win I'm not so sure if this was actually the case. 
Brenda seems really happy that her new BFF Dawn won so now she doesn't have to waist a lot of energy relieving Dawn's pathological paranoia.  Unfortunately Brenda is completely oblivious that John is putting operation blindside Brenda into effect.  He starts by recruiting Sherri then gives his pitch to Dawn.  Even with immunity Dawn is still a bit of a basket case.  It's clear she doesn't share the loyalty Brenda feels towards her but is also reluctant to let the fit Eddie slide through another vote and possibly win the next two immunities.  All signs point towards Brenda getting screwed though.
At tribal, Dawn and Sherri give academy award performances to subdue any suspicions by Brenda.  John however is a lot more cocky and blatantly states how voting out Eddie might not be the best move.  Eddie, however, says for the umpteenth time that he's sure his time is up.  As it turns out, he's wrong again and Brenda becomes the victim of one of the cruelest blindsides in Survivor history.  She's smiling at first as she tells her alliance she was genuine with them but is in tears shortly after Probst snuffs her torch.  Of course crybaby Dawn is going to really be in tears after betraying her savior Brenda, wait a second!  What is that on Dawn's face?  She's actually triumphantly smiling at her successful betrayal! 
So now, next to Russell, Dawn is officially the biggest scumbag in Survivor history and has completely killed what little chance she had left to win the game.  When this game started she was probably considered by many as the favorite to win if she got to the end but now it's impossible for her to beat anyone.  This is confirmed when Brenda arrives at Ponderosa.  Although she was completely violated by her so called friends she is greeted with unbelievable compassion at Ponderosa.  Even Andrea who was blindsided by Brenda and the others gives Brenda an extremely warm embrace and goes out of her way to comfort a very disheveled Brenda.  It's pretty obvious that everyone on the jury is completely disgusted by Dawn and she probably won't receive a single vote if she makes it to the end.  It's true Dawn couldn't of beaten Brenda at the final tribal council but she has no chance of winning now anyway.  She basically has pulled a South Pacific Coach who chose to look like a scumbag and lose to Sophie rather than nobly losing to Ozzy.
There's been some criticism of Brenda's lack of strategy this season but we learned at the reward challenge this week that her father had advised her to be humble.  That's what she did but unfortunately, this may have been her downfall.  Had she played a little bit more stronger like she did her first season she may have gotten to the end.  She's still my favorite player this season though because of her enthusiasm and compassion.  So, PLEASE VOTE FOR BRENDA TO WIN PLAYER OF THE SEASON!  I know the producers have been trying like hell to brainwash us into voting for John but Brenda deserves it much more than that Harvard nerd.


THIS SUNDAY ON SURVIVOR!  John's the favorite to win at this point but I really hope Erik or Eddie can sneak there way into the final three. 

Parvati Shallow talks about her 2nd place finish on Survivor: Heroes Vs....

Just watched this today.  I love Parvati's theory on why Russell was able to win player of the season.  She says because CBS gave him so much air time he was able to brain wash people by saying his name constantly.  I'm really surprised to hear her say she was surprised to be on the Villains side.  I will say while she should NOT have been on the heroes side neither should the rest of her black widow alliance from Micronesia, have been heroes!

Survivor Caramoan Episode 12 Recap: I'm Going Nowhere!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                "I'm going nowhere!"  Reynold loudly proclaims during tonight's first immunity challenge.  All I can say is, "you can say that again Reynold!  You're going nowhere in this game!"
The tribe is surprised when tree mail comes and reads that the next challenge is for immunity and not reward but when they get to the challenge Probst informs them that the challenge is for both immunity and reward.  The reward is "information in this game" which is exactly what Malcolm was told he bought at last weeks auction so it's safe to assume the information a clue to the hidden immunity idol and probably the same clue Malcolm got last week. 
It's amazing just how cocky John has gotten since winning an immunity challenge with an advantage!  Earlier he declared he wasn't the same Harvard nerd who was trembling in the bushes last time and then he actually shows up to the challenge showing off his ehem, manly chest.  I got news for you John, even if you end up winning the game you will ALWAYS be a Harvard nerd!  I can just imagine how he would of tore up Abi had he played with her and she called herself the greatest challenge competitor after winning immunity with an advantage!
The challenge is balancing on a triangular floating perch in the water.  Each side has two narrow strips to brace your feet on.  Every 15 minutes you move up a level until your standing on top of the perch.  Almost immediately Probst comes out with a temptation of a glass of milk and a plate of doughnuts.  Erik who is so thin that you can almost see through him decides to take it which isn't very shocking but what is shocking is that EDDIE decided to jump off with him!  I can't imagine what this lunk head was thinking.  He didn't seem to be at a point of giving up but he must be.  Sure there's a good chance they will all target Reynold before him but if Reynold wins he's almost certainly done.  Unless of course Eddie figured out the reward was a clue to the HII and hoped Reynold would win and would then share the clue and idol with him.  That was really Frick and Frack's only hope. 
When they get to the next level Probst comes out offering three hotdogs and a glass of soda to whoever jumps off.  Self proclaimed "greatest challenge competitor of Survivor Caramoan" John Cochran announces he wants to take it.  When he gets no encouragement he whines about his thighs aching but still the only who encourages him is Reynold and Probst is only too willing to quickly point that out as he hands John his food. 
Crazy Dawn starts eying Reynold like a buzzard circling it's prey.  This is when Reynold releases his obnoxious announcement.  After moving to the final stage Dawn soon falls off followed by Sherri who swims directly past Reynold splashing as hard as she can to throw him off balance but it doesn't work.  I'm sure she knows if Reynold wins and finds the HII she'll probably be the target. 
So this leaves Andrea, Brenda and Reynold.  Reynold nearly falls in twice but makes a great recovery but about 10 minutes later he loses his concentration and falls in.  Even though the winner is redundant at this point both Andrea and Brenda refuse to give up.  They have an interesting dialogue where they try to get the other to jump off with Brenda saying things like "are you worried or something?" and Andrea offering to share the clue with Brenda if she jumps off.  Ultimately they don't agree and stay up there for another two hours before agreeing to ad a fourth stage of balancing on one leg.  Probst counts them down and reminds them that this is their rule not his.  Moments later Brenda falls off and Andrea wins immunity.  As I've said before both of these girls are very tough.
Back at camp Andrea reluctantly shares the clue with Brenda.  Personally I don't think she was under any obligation to do this since Brenda didn't actually jump off but I guess she didn't want any drama.  It is indeed the same clue Malcolm got and Andrea decides to share it with her entire alliance.  They rush off to find the idol leaving Eddie and Reynold to prepare for their arrivals to Ponderosa.  Erik finds the idol and much to John's dismay immediately hands it over to Andrea.  That is the fair thing to do since it was her clue though.  He would of looked like a real asshole if he would of stuffed it in his pocked in front of everyone. 
Most of the group is relieved that they will be able to get rid of Reynold or Eddie next.  Everyone that is except for Andrea.  She is dying to make a big move and is desperate to blindside someone.  She says "blindsides need to happen before someone blindsides me".  I think a big part of it is she's seriously crushing on Eddie and doesn't want him to go anywhere yet.  So she starts discussing the possibility with John and Sherri.  She suggest blindsiding Dawn or Brenda.  John considers possibly going after Brenda but definitely does not want to take out Dawn since she has turned herself into a goat to ride to the end.  So Andrea goes to Dawn with the idea of blindsiding Brenda and as I wrote a few weeks ago Dawn is already starting to turn on her savior Brenda.  As she herself says "The biggest obstacle is not having an opponent out here the biggest obstacle has been my mind"  Couldn't of said it better myself.
Despite the little bit of drama at camp the tribe sticks with the plan to take out the two guys.  They split the vote just in case, but not equally with two going towards Eddie and four going towards Reynold, which is enough.  Reynold and Eddie don't even try to squirm their way out of the inevitable and throw the votes at Erik and Sherri.  So Reynold goes home but is very gracious in his confessional and declares he had the time of his life. 
With Reynold gone now the girls outnumber the guys for the first time!  Not for long though!  Because tonight there are two immunity challenges! 
Back at camp everyone but Eddie is celebrating Reynold's departure and Andrea is still itching for a blindside.  Careful what you wish for Andrea!  For some reason she is again discussing this with the biggest weasel in Survivor history John Cochran.  Naturally the goes running to Dawn and Brenda and drops the dime on Andrea wanting to take one of them out.  Incredibly Dawn does not completely explode in paranoia and stays relatively calm and collected.  She doesn't even shed one tear.  At least not on camera. 
The immunity challenge is similar to the challenge Andrea narrowly lost to Rob who almost died beating her before she was voted off the first time on Redemption Island.  They both involved retrieving ladder rungs to climb to the top of a wall, the difference is this one is not as high and you must maneuver a buoy through a bunch of obstacles located in shallow water, to release a key that unlocks a chest that contains the ladder rungs. 
The challenge is a huge blow out by Erik.  His closest competitors are Brenda and Andrea.  "Mr. Incredible Challenge Force" John Cochran wasn't even a factor having gotten bet to the ladder stage but everyone including Sherri!
So now operation blindside Andrea is in full effect.  The trick is not to let her know because she still has the idol.  This is what happens when you get too impatient to make a big move in Survivor.  It often back fires on you.
They do a spectacular job and convince Andrea that they are all turning on Brenda.  Andrea even says how she feels bad for Brenda because she feels so comfortable which is how she felt when she got blindsided. 
Andrea reveals the plan to Eddie who says for the first time in 30 days he feels comfortable with who's going home.  I wonder if Eddie has ever said anything in his entire life that turned out to be right. 
Andrea then starts planting the seeds of a final three with Eddie to John.  John then confesses how he hasn't been able to mention Eddie's name to Andrea for the past 10 days without Andrea saying "Eddie's harmless I control his vote".  Apparently she's still saying this even after he voted for her!  So this really worries John who becomes more determined than ever to take out Andrea.  One odd thing he says though is he wants to be a part of everybody's plan and if he's not a part of Andrea's plan he doesn't want her to be a part of his, even though she told him her plan was to take Eddie to the end with John. 
So unless Andrea plays her idol she's done for.  However, they again play it safe and decide to throw two votes at Eddie, which would result in a tie between him and Brenda if Andrea plays her idol and IF Erik agrees to turn on Andrea.  This seems like it might be a long shot since Erik went along with Andrea to take out Corine.  Not to mention the fact that Andrea promised Erik final three, of course she's also promised this to John and Eddie, but no one else to my knowledge has promised Erik that.  This would seem to suggest that it will be a close call.  I would think Andrea would be the favorite to survive since she seems to be thriving from the game and looking hotter and hotter each episode.  Brenda on the other hand, while still hot, isn't nearly as hot as she was on day 1 and just appears to be so beaten down by the experience. 

But as it turns out that may have been what worked to her advantage.  Even though John kind of screws up and reveals that not only does he believe people have falsely promised him final three but that he has also falsely promised people final three.  Andrea admits this makes her nervous but it's not enough of a red flag for her to play the idol.  The reading of the votes is pretty exciting.  Andrea is shocked when she sees her name the first time then on the second time she cries out "what?!" and pretty much knows she's been taken.  I guess she should of asked Erik to give her the necklace.  Speaking of which, I can't believe Probst missed a great Survivor moment by not asking Erik if he wanted to give up immunity.  Remarkably though, Andrea appears to be actually excited by being blindsided and not the least bit bitter.  I guess she realizes how foolish she was not to play the idol.  Especially since there will probably only be two more chances after this tribal to play it.  She has a big smile on her face as she carries her torch to Probst and says "that was really good".  Meanwhile Reynold, with his John Holmes mustache, practically creams all over himself when he sees his bro Eddie has dodged yet another bullet!  So just like that we're down to six.

NEXT WEEK ON SURVIVOR!  The previews make John look to be in trouble so that means he's obviously safe as a kitten.  Unless Eddie wins immunity, which he has yet to do, he should be going home.  The really big question is will Andrea wear her immunity necklace to next weeks tribal council?  The finale is scheduled for a week from Sunday so it looks like we'll have a final 5 finale again! 

Survivor Caramoan Episode 11 Recap: The Fall of the Amigos!

The episode opens with everyone's delight at Phillips departure.  The next morning we see that Brenda, who hasn't been on the last two rewards and is completely wasting away, is starting to lose it.  She is actually comforted by resident crazy Dawn who suggests that they need to "get everybody drinking".  Then my eyes are in complete shock when this is followed by a confessional by Brenda!  That's two whole episodes in a row!  Unfortunately it's not a very flattering one and is a bigger sign of how much she's suffering right now.  We also hear from "The Silent One" who plants the first seeds of doubt on the solidness of the majority alliance.
After the credits Dawn announces tree mail has arrived which excites everyone.  She then whips out some envelopes and being the lunatic that she is, releases this insane sound out of her mouth.  John instantly knows this means it's time for a Survivor auction.  Malcolm is a little depressed because he knows he's in trouble and that he may be forced to pull an Abi-Maria and forgo food so he can buy an advantage in the next immunity challenge.
Despite this Malcolm is the winner of the very first item.  The item is a beer and peanuts, however it cannot be bid on more that once and goes to the first $20.  When Malcolm walks up to retrieve his item he is given the good news that the item comes with two more ice cold beers and a bowl of pretzels.  Then next item is covered and is won by Reynold.  Before he can see what it is though, he is give the opportunity to trade it for one of two other covered items.  John advises him to trade but Reynold tells him that he doesn't trust him and sticks with the original item.  Turns out John is right and Reynold bought one slice of pizza but the second item was the rest of the pizza.  At least he didn't trade it for the third item which was a rotten coconut.  Sherri then offers to buy the rest of the pizza for $500.  Probst hesitates for the signal through his earpiece on weather or not this is acceptable.  Eventually he accepts Sherri's offer. 
The next item is uncovered and is a roasted whole chicken.  No sides or drink and Dawn, being the lunatic that instantly bids all her money for it.  Then next item is described as "information in this game".  Malcolm immediately bids the rest of his money.  Even though there are a few people who still have their entire roll he wins the item. 
Unfortunately it's not an advantage in the immunity challenge but is instead a clue to the hidden immunity idol and he is only given 60 seconds to read it.  Andrea wins the next item which is a full spaghetti dinner, complete with several slices of garlic bread and a glass of wine.  Unfortunately Andrea is faced with the same dilemma that Carter was dealt last season when Probst gives her the opportunity to give up the dinner for bags of rice and beans.  Naturally she does the same thing as Carter and takes rice and beans.  If I were Brenda I would of done like Sherri and offered all my money for the spaghetti, but neither she or anyone else thinks to do this. 
Then next item is indeed the desirable advantage to the next challenge.  Brenda and Eddie both bid on it but John actually wins it.  Brenda wins the next item which turns out to be pig brain.  What transpires next is a little bizarre.  Brenda who had expressed concern throughout the challenge of getting burned says she doesn't feel like crying for some reason.  Probst asks her if she wants to try it.  Brenda must of been really starving because she actually accepts the offer.  Then she comments how she just remembered that she doesn't eat pork.  Probst reminds her of what she's eating and she seeks Probst assurances that it's good for her.  Probst simply replies he has no idea.  Then Brenda actually takes the tray of pig brain back with her.  I noticed that this item's cover was blue while I think the rest were all red.  Maybe this inconsistency was meant to be a warning.  I have to remember that if I ever get on the show.
Well Dawn manages to ALMOST get through a whole 15 minutes of the episode without crying but when Probst whips out a stack of letters from home and announces they are individually for sale for a mere $20 the tears immediately start to flow since she spent every cent she had on a chicken.  Both Malcolm and Sherri share her regret and of course everyone else buys their letter.  The last item is won by Eddie.  It turns out to be a giant bowl of peanut butter and he has 60 seconds to share it with the other tribe.  Personally I don't really like this twist.  I think sharing it with the tribe should be optional.  Of course I would definitely recommend that that option be exercised, but nevertheless should be an option. 
As everyone is digging into the pb Sherri who is apparently even more desperate to stay in the game than we thought allows John to lick peanut butter off her fingers several times.  For once I am actually jealous of John.  Sherri may not be as hot as Brenda but she's still a MILF and I would love to lick peanut butter off her entire body!
After the auction the next confessional is by Brenda!  Twice in one show?!  OMG!  This makes me concerned that she might be going home this episode.  In the confessional she again expresses her desire for some real food but is so grateful to have her letter.  John of all people is also extremely emotional by his letter.  This is somewhat surprising when you stop to consider all the crap his parents must of done to him to turn him into such a basket case!
Reynold goes to work on Sherri and we see another clue to a possible mutiny.  He then expresses his delight at having eaten and having a clue to the HII within his alliance.
Then next morning Malcolm gets up early to search for said idol which is buried beneath some rocks surrounding a tree near the well.  Before he can find it though he gets busted by Andrea and John.  Unlike John who is obviously very intimidated by Malcolm, Andrea has the presence of mind to not leave Malcolm alone and plants herself on the well.  Malcolm joins her in an attempt to outlast her.  She tells him he can do whatever he wants but she's not leaving.  So the two of them sit there apparently until it's time to go to the next challenge. 
The immunity challenge is holding onto a rope that is attached to a log that weighs one third of what each person's body weight was when they began the game.  The rope has several knots it it to provide leverage when holding it.  As the challenge progresses you must move your had lower and lower down the rope.  John is told to reveal his secret message which says that at anytime in the challenge he can move back up two knots.  John exercises this option as soon as he get to the third level.  I have to say this advantage is a hell of lot fairer than the one Abi got last season so even with this option I'm pretty sure Reynold, Malcolm or Eddie will be able to beat John.  It ends up coming down to John, Eddie and Reynold.  At this point Eddie and Reynold have don't have a knot to brace against like John does but I'm still sure they can take him.  I figure Reynold is the favorite to win but he drops out first so it's up to Eddie to keep John from doing another ridiculous victory dance.  Eddie puts up a good fight but unfortunately comes up just a little short and John wins again and celebrates with his stupid dance.
Back at camp John's head has gotten even bigger than Phillip's ever was.  He actually starts going on about what a great challenge threat he is and starts talking about himself like he's as good at challenges as Boston Rob or Ozzy.  He's too stupid to realize if didn't have the advantage he probably would of been out of the challenge before Brenda!
Meanwhile, Malcolm is in a huge state of despair because he can't find the idol.  He's very vocal of the fact that he was able to find two idols without a clue but now can't find one that he paid $480 for a clue.  I can only imagine his frustration.  He's also afraid to look for the idol because he knows the girls will start digging around him.  If I were him I would of just enlisted Eddie and Reynold and had them help him look for it or he could of just told them the approximate area where it is hidden, then let them look for it without him. 
Instead he decides to try to bluff his way through the next tribal.  He goes to work on Sherri to target Andrea telling her that he has the idol and Reynold works on Erik. 
Power players John and Andrea discuss their options.  Andrea wants to split the vote between Malcolm and Reynold but John thinks they should consider doing a strait vote on one of the amigos because at this point they only need one person to flip if they do a split vote.  The thing that concerns me is they are discussing all of this in front of both Sherri and Erik who are the most likely to flip.  Both Sherri and Erik seem to be waffling on what they are going to do.  It's also not revealed on whether the majority alliance will split or not.
Tribal council doesn't make things a whole lot clearer but I get a strong suspicion that either Erik or Sherri WILL flip but if the alliance decides to do a strait vote that won't matter.  However, I see Andrea vote for Reynold and John vote for Malcolm so I know there doing a split.  At this point I'm pretty sure Andrea is going home but when the votes are read it turns out to be a three way between Andrea, Reynold and Malcolm which under normal circumstances would probably really excite Malcolm and Reynold but this is Survivor and it ends up spelling doom for Malcolm who everyone, including Eddie votes for on the re vote.  Can't blame Eddie too much since Malcolm did vote for his BFF two tribals ago. 
Of course Dawn doesn't miss a chance to vie for Malcolm's jury vote by rubbing his shoulder's as he gets up.  Then as he wishes the tribe good luck she does what she did with Brandon and tries to act so sorry that he she voted for him.  What a phony! 
At ponderosa Malcolm is extremely concerned about encountering the wrath of Phillip.  To his surprise though Phillip is actually very gracious and tells Malcolm he played a great game and if he had made it to the final that he would of voted for him. 
Malcolm made several mistakes in his gameplay that led to his downfall.  The first was going against his alliance to form a bromance with Reynold and Eddie.  The second was not showing his idol to Erik.  The third was giving and idol to Eddie.  Had he not done that he could of saved himself this week and could of possibly won immunity next week and or found another idol.  The other was buying information at the auction.  Obviously he was too drunk from his beers to realize that information is not the same as an "advantage".  Having that information also put a huge target on his back.  Like I said before I think the stress of playing back to back seasons took a heavy toll on him and affected his gameplay in a negative way.
I have to say that since the merge there's been a really interesting dynamic as far as eliminations.  The merge started with girls being outnumbered 7 to 5 and fans being outnumbered 8 to 4.  Yet three out of the last four eliminations have been guys and three out of four have been favorites.  As I said before it's not always a bad thing to go into a merge outnumbered.

NEXT WEEK ON SURVIVOR!
I believe the streak of unpredictable endings has ended.  Eddie and Reynold have managed to dodge bullet after bullet but I'm pretty sure one of them are going down next week!  I'm sad to say I think John is now the favorite to win the game.  I think the alliance will take out Eddie and Reynold next and then Dawn will probably use Brenda to take out Andrea.  Then Dawn, being the lunatic that she is, will probably turn on Brenda leaving a final four of Erik, Sherri, Dawn and John.  I don't think Dawn has a snowballs chance in hell of getting any jury votes after all her betrayals and crocodile tears, so John will probably ride her to the end like a goat.  I think Sherri has also pissed off too many people to win.  Erik could possibly beat John in jury votes but he'll need to win the final immunity to get to the final tribal which of course is quite possible but it's more probably that he won't and John will easily beat Dawn and Sherri to win the game.

Survivor Caramoan Episode 10 recap: The Crack of Dawn!

Despite being robbed of confrontations between Reynold and Malcolm and Eddie and Andrea this was a pretty thrilling episode.  It starts off with the tribe returning from tribal and the three amigos Malcolm, Eddie and Reynold being shunned by Stealth R Us who head down to the beach to plan their next move.  They decide they want to target Reynold but with a majority of 7 to 3 they can now safely split the votes between Malcolm and Reynold.  If I were Reynold and Eddie I probably would of turned on Malcolm.  In retrospect, this would not of been a good move but I after the stunt he pulled last week I would of washed my hands of him and went to the favs and said "Malcolm fucked us last time so we're voting for him next tribal!"  I guess Reynold is so desperate for allies that he's willing to forgive Malcolm for voting for him and conning him out of his idol though. 
The next day Dawn is really cracking up.  She starts moaning in agony and Brenda comes rushing to her rescue.  She reveals to Brenda that she has a retainer of false bottom teeth that she lost while swimming and she made the brilliant decision to take in a mouthful of water.  That alone is enough proof that Dawn has become a full blown mental case if she's crazy enough to drink unpurifed water that others have no doubt been swimming in.  Dawn starts blubbering that if she doesn't find them she'll be too embarrassed to show up to the next challenge which apparently is grounds for disqualification.  Brenda comforts Dawn, grabs a pair of goggles and dives down to retrieve Dawn's teeth.
Dawn embraces Brenda and tells her how much she loves her.  Thanks to this episode we actually get a brief confessional by Brenda who says the incident has bonded her and Dawn until the end.  I wouldn't get to comfortable if I were Brenda though.  This is the same bitch that was plotting to take out Ozzy moments after he came to her rescue in South Pacific.  She's also betrayed just about everyone she's come in contact wih this season.  According to post game interviews Corrine saw Dawn as her bet friend. 
Dawn admits the game is overwhelming her and even Phillip is calling her a lunatic.  You can't get any lower than when the Specialist thinks you're crazy.  John compares her to Brandon and predicts she may be the next humming bird to fly over the cukoo's nest.  However, John has also confided to Phillip that Dawn is no loner unbeatable at the final tribal and because of all the people she's betrayed she could be a great goat to take to the end.
Speaking of betrayal, for some reason I can't figure out, Andrea continues to be chummy with the amigos.  This girl must be really hard up.  This makes Dawn become even more paranoid and she approaches Phillip and John about her fears that Andrea is out to get her.  They of course realize that Dawn is just nuts and don't appear to have any interest in targeting Andrea.
I am soooooo sick of Dawn's crocodile tears!  What I want to know is why the fuck would they bring such a crybaby back a second time?  In my article on returning players done last year I said Dawn was a bad choice to bring back.  Along with most of the other "favorites".  It's not like she showed some great emotional fortitude in South Pacific.  I knew back then she was a total basket case and a big phony.  Anyone who gets overwhelmed by the game on Day 26 does NOT deserve to be any kind of All Star!  They could of brought back Laura Morrett and had such a better season!  I guarantee you Laura wouldn't be losing it in less than a month.  Not to mention that Laura is waaaaay better eye candy than Dawn.  I think it's safe to say that Laure wouldn't be caught dead wearing a pair of grey and black knee high socks with hot pink sneakers!  So once again, shame on you Survivor casting department!  Might I suggest you guys start splitting your Prozacs in half?
Any way, at the reward challenge two teams of five compete for a day at a resort.  Team Orange is Malcolm, Eddie, Sherri, Brenda and Andrea.  One at a time the teams must navigate their way across some beams then into a mud pit where they must retrieve a bag of balls, and then take those balls under a bar through a pit of rice.  Once every team member has retrieved a bag the teams must throw each ball into a goal.  Malcolm and Erik are first.  Malcolm decides to get cute and stay in the mud pit and look for all the bags before moving to the next stage.  Reynold is second for Purple and he decides to do the same thing and even though Malcolm had a head start Reynold finds the rest of his teams bags before Malcolm does.  Sherri does a pretty pitiful performance for orange but really it's Malcolm's fumbling around in the mud pit that is the true downfall of team orange.  So once again Malcolm gets his ass whipped by John and Orange is completely massacred by Purple.  I'm starting to wonder if Sherri is just pretending to be useless to establish herself as nonthreatening.  She does have a pretty nice body and looks to be pretty fit.
The reward has plenty of food and booze but also a luxurious pool and shower.  Everyone but Phillip washes themselves off to keep from contaminating the pool.  This breach of etiquette by Phillip really ticks off Erik.
The immunity challenge is a water challenge that splits the tribe into two groups of rivals where they must dive down under a platform, come up the other side and move a group of rings from the back to the front of the platform.  The top two from each group face off in a final round.  Phillip elects to sit out because he's too scared of the water.
Reynold and Malcolm are the first two finalist followed by Brenda and Andrea.  However it's really a two person race between Malcolm and Reynold.  In the end Reynold wins immunity and even though this tribal was foretold to be truly shocking I can't figure out anyway that either Eddie or Malcolm aren't going home tonight.  After all, Stealth R Us have already stated their plans to split the vote and the amigos only have one idol.  But then the commercial break comes on and shows the three choices for player of the week being Reynold, Malcolm and Eddie.  I can't remember a player that was voted off being in the running for player of the week so I'm like "what the fuck"?  How are they going to pull this off?  Is Malcolm going to use his idol to pull someone over from Stealth?  Will Malcolm trust Reynold enough to give him his idol and have Reynold give him immunity at tribal to try to confuse stealth's voting plan?  One thing I'm sure of is they're not going to acquire another idol. 
There is a misconception among some Survivor fans that when an idol gets played another one automatically get put back into circulation.  I'm talking to you Dalton Ross!  In reality this is not entirely accurate.  This is how the somewhat confusing rules of idol play have worked in every season up until this point since the advent of having more than one idol in circulation.  Basically, If there are no more idols in play within one GIVEN tribe then another idol gets put into circulation.  So for example if it's pre merge and there are 2 or 3 tribes.  Let's call them tribes A, B and C.  Each tribe's camp has an idol hidden there at the start of the game.  Let's say all three idols are found and the idols from tribe B and C are played or the person who has them is voted out without using them, then another idol is hidden at tribes B and C's camp.  If there are 3 tribes and the tribes are merged into two tribes and tribe A now has two tribe mates with an idol and one person uses his or is voted out before the merge but one person still has his, in that case another idol would NOT be put back into circulation until the other person who has an idol either uses his or is voted out.
Same way with post merged tribes.  If the merge happens with two people in possession of idols and one of those people uses their idol or is voted out they don't normally put another one into circulation until the other person with an idol uses his or is voted out.  Last season when Abi played her idol and Malcolm still had his, another idol was not put into circulation.  Same way in One World when Troy played his and Kim had one and in Redemption Island when Ralph played his and Rob had one in his pocket.  In each of those cases no extra idols were hidden because they only had one tribe and there was still an idol in play within those tribes.  Also in Samoa and Heroes Vs Villains, when two idols were depleted at one tribal they did not put two more idols into circulation to replace the ones that were played, they only put one more back into circulation. 
This season, and this episode, however they evidently decided to change that rule by hiding another idol after Malcolm played Reynold's last week even though Malcolm still had one.  I have to say I am not at all happy with this change.  I think it cheapens the integrity of the game to have that many idols continuously in play within one tribe.  So I'm pretty stunned when Dawn, Andrea and the three amigos go searching for an idol and actually find one!  As it turns out the person who finds it is the very person who already has one, that being Malcolm.  Not only that but he finds it right in front of Dawn and Andrea.  When I first saw him pull that idol out of that rock I thought maybe it was the one he already had and he planted it, which Dawn actually accuses him of.
So this causes a little bit of dissension withing Stealth but not a whole lot because they believe this is the only idol in play and they can still take one of the three amigos out by splitting their votes. 

At tribal though, they get a big shock when Malcolm pulls out two idols and hands one to Eddie.  He then announces that they will be playing both idols and voting for Phillip.  Everyone but Phillip starts panicking and asking themselves what to do.  Brenda wants to vote for Andrea but can't communicate this to Dawn no matter how hard she tries.  To his credit Phillip makes no attempts to place the target on anyone else and suggests they just stick to the plan and hope that at least one of them don't use their idols.  This was actually Malcolm's plan but I got to believe he might want to amend that thought now that Phillip has said that.  Andrea meanwhile is really bugging because she thinks the guys might be just pretending to take out Phillip so they can blindside her, which makes absolutely no sense to me.  Actually it doesn't make a lot of sense to me for Malcolm to announce he has two idols and is going to play them when that's what he was planning to do.  If he was planning on playing both idols and take out Phillip he should of just kept his mouth shut.  By announcing his big move he risks the chance of the seven voting out someone else, like Sherri.
So vote time arrives and the big question is will Phillip finally get his torch snuffed or will Malcolm actually be stupid enough not to play his idol or will everyone just turn on Phillip.  Again to my surprise Erik is the only one who goes against the plan and votes for "Fillup".  Erik's disloyalty is no surprise since he's never really liked Phillip. 
After the votes are cast Eddie immediately gets up to play his idol, Malcolm, however remains seated for a few seconds but eventually does get up to play his idol.  So at that moment Phillip's fate is sealed but the three amigos also have a lot of tap dancing to do because they are still out numbered 2 to 1 and they are all out of idols.  In the mean time though, Reynold and Eddie have once AGAIN dodged some lethal bullets!  These guys are harder to kill then Jason Vorhees!
I have to say that I really hated Phillip the last time he played.  That's why I can't believe I'm saying this but I really enjoyed Phillip this season and I'm really gonna miss him.  I loved how he opennly made alliances with everyone in his tribe, I loved the code names and LOVED his man-crush on Boston Rob!  So the specialist's reign has come to an end and he has finally had his torch snuffed.  Hard to believe it took TWO immunity idols to get Phillip voted out but he can hang his high at that fact and at the fact that 5 of his 6 alliance members stuck by him to the bitter end.  If I had been Phillip I would of pleaded with the remaining members of Stealth to stick together and take out the amigos.  He could of even said anybody who flips over to them won't get his jury vote.

NEXT WEEK ON SURVIVOR! This will be a critical turning point in the game.  If the remaining members of Stealth can stick together they can easily take out the three biggest challenge threats in the game.  However, the tribe is now down to 9 so the three amigos only need to get two people to flip to completely change the game and it looks like Sherri is seriously considering a flip. If the three amigos can somehow make it to the end I think Reynold is probably the favorite to win it all.

Survivor Caramoan Episode 9 Recap: The Ghost of Russell!

Although it was very brief, this week Malcolm became only the third person in Survivor history to be in possession of two immunity idols.  That's a pretty impressive accomplishment but unfortunately the rest of his performance this week was anything but.  After getting his ass whipped by John at last week's immunity challenge he gets outmatched by John again in not one but two more challenges!  He also implements some incredibly bizarre strategic moves that I'm pretty sure have destoyed his game.  Apparently playing in back to back seasons is having a drastic effect on his game play.  Malcolm is the first player since Russell Hantz to play back to back with less than a month break in between seasons.  After watching Malcolm play so badly this season I'm starting to consider the possibility that Russell isn't as big of an idiot as he appeared to be in Heroes Vs Villains. 
While it's true he did play pretty badly in Samoa his game play in HVV was one of the worst in Survivor history.  This is a man who went to the end against two former winners and couldn't get a single vote, but maybe I've been too hard on Russell and his horrible game play had a lot to do with the stress of playing so soon after his first season.  This could very well of contributed to his early exit on Redemption Island as well.
Well back to Caramoan.  The episode starts off with Phillip announcing it's Michael Jordan day (23) and an awkward closeup of Andrea's kiester.  Then we see Reynold talking about how proud he is of one his alliance members getting voted out last week.  He seems to be joining the large group of cast members this season that need a serious reality check.  After realizing that every girl that hitches her wagon to himself and Eddie gets voted out he attempts to use this to his favor and targets Andrea.  He then comes right out and asks Andrea what her strategy is.  Does anybody actually expect to get a strait answer to this question on Survivor?  It's about as ludicrous as Joe Girardi walking over to the Red Sox dug out and asking them how they plan to pitch his batters during the playoffs.
Phillip, who suddenly needs to wear glasses, is solidifying his relationship with Sherry.  As I predicted last week she gets a SRU code name, which is "Tenacity".  Phillip is even more arrogant than ever but I have to say I'm still enjoying him this season.  Sherry calls him her Shamar over here, who oddly enough she called her Phillip.
At the reward challenge the tribe is split into two groups of five.  Since there are eleven tribe members "Tenacity" is left out of the challenge.  They don't even let her pick a side to root for.  As I said last season I really don't like it when they do this and I think that all challenges after the merge should be individual like there were in the early years of Survivor.
The challenge has one person from each team perched in the middle of the water and must defend a goal from members of the other team who jump off a platform in front of the perch.  Team Orange is made up of Malcolm, Phillip, Dawn, Brenda and Andrea.  Malcolm defends for Orange and Michael defends for Purple.  As usual Brenda is super excited and shakes her cute little booty in anticipation of the match.
The first thrower is Eddie who evidently is confused and thinks the object is to hit the defender as he propels his ball directly at Malcolm.  Brenda scores the first goal of the match but then John of all people ties it up and then seemingly becomes possessed by an oragatang. 
Later it becomes tied up 3 3 and Brenda has a chance to score the winning goal but comes up just short as the ball bounces off the goal.  Then it becomes Erik's chance to be the hero.  Phillip tries to distract him by saying "I don't know why you took your sneakers off."  Then just as he begins his launch Phillip yells "MISTAKE"!  But it doesn't work and Michael finally gets to go on a reward.  The reward being a chance to propel down a waterfall down to a picnic lunch.
At the reward the fans try to sway John into forming an all male alliance.  For some reason they don't attempt to include Erik.  The old idiotic John finally shows his face as he boasts in a confessional about how stupid it was of them to use that tactic on himself who has no interests in partaking in any kind of "tom foolery with these numb skulls."  John is too stupid to realize the fans were simply playing one of the few cards they had available.  Maybe they should of told him not to vote them out because they all have birthdays coming up.
Meanwhile, Malcolm continues his nightmare episode by pulling a Julia and going to the person he tried to vote out last week to help him get back into the game.  Sherry or "Tenacity" as she's now know in Stealth R Us plays along but we can see she's not ready to place her trust in Malcolm just yet.  Then he goes to the biggest blabbermouth of the season, Dawn and tries to enlist her help.  Even Dawn acknowledges the stupidity of trusting someone like her. 
They tell Andrea who devises a plan to oust Malcolm by telling him they're going to target Reynold and Eddie but then blindside Malcolm.  Andrea then goes flirting with Eddie who is only too happy to flirt back.  However, both elude to the fact that they're playing each other.  In my opinion it's probably a little of both.
The immunity challenge is the classic pressing your face into a grate as the tide rises.  Phillip decides to "throw the challenge" and is first out.  Erik Dawn Sherry and Malcolm soon follow.  The last three guys fall out within 3 seconds of each other which leaves the two remaining girls Brenda and Andrea to fight it out. This gives Dawn a huge tickle!  I guess she needs every little help she can get to avoid her inevitable meltdown!
Both the girls employ a very smart strategy of bracing themselves with their legs over the edge of the grate to get better leverage.  The battle is pretty intense as tough farm girl Andrea gives Brenda a good run for her money, as she is the only one that drops below water and comes back up under the grate.  I've always said Andrea in an underrated challenge competitor.  In the end though, Brenda is victorious.  Latinos rule!  During the challenge it appeared as though she was coasting through it but when she comes up for air you can see by the look on her face that it wasn't nearly as easy for her as she made it look.
So now it's time to finally hear a confessional from Brenda this episode.  Wait, what?  All we get to hear her say is "thank you"???????????  WTF!  She wins the fucking immunity challenge and we still don't get to hear any comments from her?!  I can just imagine if they hadn't given John any air time after he won immunity last week.  Knowing him he probably would of filed a lawsuit!  I'm really getting tired of Brenda not getting equal time!  She's one of the few players I was glad to see return this season.
Ok on to the pre tribal dance.  The editors throw a lot of shit at us to try to confuse us as to the outcome.  We see Malcolm contemplating on how this is his last chance to take control of the game.  We see him plotting with Andrea to vote with the "favorites" then see him plotting with Dawn to take out Andrea who says she wants to see the idol.  So Reynold shows it to her.  Then we see Phillip plotting to take out "Reynolds".  I don't know what happened to taking out Malcolm.  Then we see Eddie and Andrea talking a whole bunch of panicked gibberish, and Eddie spills the beans that she's a target which totally freaks her out and she decides to play it safe and vote for Michael which ticks off Dawn.  So Andrea says she can switch it back.  Which is where we are left at right before the hike to tribal. 
I'm not sure why Andrea was so panicked since even with Malcolm the fans don't have the votes to take her out.  Unless she was thinking they also had Sherry, but even then, all she has to do is have the favs not split the votes.  They still could of taken out Malcolm.  I don't get why they changed from him to Michael.
At tribal Phillip gives a big speech on loyalty and taking out anyone who shows any sign of disloyalty.  We know that Malcolm for some reason votes against the fans who all vote for Andrea, and votes for Reynold.  After the vote Reynold gets up to use his idol at which point Malcolm pulls one the shadiest moves by any player in Survivor history who's initials aren't RH!  He tells Reynold that everybody voted for him and to give him the idol.  Reynold gives him a suspicious look but Malcolm assures him that he's being dead serious and Reynold actually gives him the idol! 
When Brenda throws her face into her palms I think maybe Malcolm just made a brilliant move but he doesn't get one vote and Michael ends up going home.  So after that I'm thinking Malcolm is pretty much fucked.  I'm guessing he was trying to ensure getting Reynold voted out for some reason.  Obviously there was a lot we didn't see.  Did the rest of the favs tell Malcolm they were voting for Michael and he just didn't believe them?  He must of thought they were voting for Reynold.  So that tells me the favs are probably sick of Malcolm. 
In any event Malcolm is in some hot water now.  That was such a low move he pulled on Reynold and I'm pretty sure Reynold's going to know that Malcolm voted for him and totally tried to play him since Andrea only got 3 votes, he got one and the rest went to Michael.  What's he gonna say?  That Michael voted for Reynold?  And what's he going to say to Reynold if he ever uses his idol?  I'm sure Malcolm will try to squirm his way back into the favs but I don't see that happening.  Even if by some miracle Malcolm makes it to the end now I don't see him being able to win.  He's burned to many bridges in this weeks episode. 
As far as Eddie and Reynold, once again they manage to dodge some bullets.

NEXT WEEK ON SURVIVOR!  Dawn pulls a Brandon and begins her journey in the abyss of total madness.  Like Brandon, it's not a short trip.  And Eddie and Malcolm have some big explaining to do to Andrea and Reynold.

Survivor Caramoan Episode 8 Recap: The Lines Are Drawn In The Sand!

Sorry I took so long with this weeks recap.  I was busy trying to impress this girl I have a crush on by eating the most disgusting things I could find washed up on a nearby beach in front of her!  I'm pretty sure I've won her heart after she's seen me eat a drowned rat I was lucky enough to find!  Anyway onto this weeks recap!
The episode starts off with Phillip pulling Corrine and Dawn aside to drop his big bombshell that he threw the challenge.  The look on Corrine's face is almost as entertaining as the look was on John's face last week when Phillip was telling him the same thing. 
They ask him why he didn't tell them before the challenge because they would of been ok with it and Phillip explains he didn't decide to do it until they were in the middle of the challenge.  As Corrine later says in a confessional, "That's convenient.  That's around the same time that you blew the challenge!"
However, the next morning we see Phillip and Corrine talking and they're actually not at each other's throats.  It's obvious by the exchange that the feuding between them has been exaggerated by the editing.  I'm not saying they like each other but evidently they have had moments of being civil with each other, as they are now discussing their game plan for the next phase of the game.
And buckle your seatbelts because you're never gonna believe what happens next!  Dawn starts to get emotional!  All this strategy talk is too much for Dawn who goes running to the well and starts to spew out some more crocodile tears.  She is then seen contemplating about how she fucked up her game last time by not dropping the dime on John when he flipped.  This is some pretty heavy foreshadowing that a "favorite" will try to flip with the fans this week and will end up biting the dust for their betrayal.
Soon after we see Corrine expressing a lot of excitement about being part of a blindside and I immediately get flashbacks of Kat from One World declaring how fun blindsides are moments before getting blindsided.  So things aren't looking too good for Corrine.
At Gota, the tribe is surprised by the appearance of a boat that gives them the news they must pack their stuff and head to their new home.  The boat takes them to the Bikal tribe, probably because it has all the reward items.  Reynold is nervous about the reception they are going to receive but relieved when everyone is quite diplomatic in their welcome.  However, he still knows he's on thin ice. 
Even with the absence of Probst the tribe is give a traditional feast for making it to the merge.  Malcolm suggests the name of Enil Edam, and Andrea comments on how that means "new beginning".  Everyone but Corrine likes the name who thinks it's the dumbest name ever and has too many sylaballs.  Little does she know that it's her partner in crime Malcolm's sly way of giving a shout out to his mom whose name is Madeline which spelled backwards is Enil Edam!  This poses the question on how Andrea came to think it meant "new beginning".  Most likely her and Malcolm had discussed ideas on a merged tribe name while still at Gota camp, that ended up on the cutting room floor.
After the feast we see old partners Phillip and Andrea and Malcolm and Corrine realigning.  Corrine who has gone on and on about not wanting to betray her alliance for the last few weeks is delighted to hear Malcolm is on board to betray their alliance.  ????????  Looking worse and worse for Corrine.
The tribe is then notified of their first individual immunity challenge.  They find out it's a food eating challenge which repulses everyone except for John who thinks if he eats enough disgusting things it will dramatically improve his love life and get the girls falling all over him.  I've said it before and I'll say it again.  John is a real weirdo!
Reynold on the other hand is very concerned because he knows he doesn't have a strong stomach and he probably has a huge target on his back.  This makes me think he may end up playing his idol tonight.
At the immunity challenge the tribe is split up in groups of 6 with the top 3 of each group facing off against each other in another group of 6 and then the top 3 of that group face off against each other, and then one final round of the top two from that group.
The first group is Corrine, Erik, Andrea, Malcolm, Eddie, and Sherri and the dish is live beetle larvae.  Malcolm, Eddie and Andrea move on to the next round.  Then next group is Dawn, John, Phillip, Michael, Brenda, and Reynold and for once Brenda is not smiling at a challenge.  Dawn on the other hand tries to cheat by picking up one of the worms and Probst tells her to put down her "food" and wait.  Dawn gets really confused and is like "wait"?  Probst again tells her to wait and she confusingly says "for...".  For once, Probst is a little stunned and can't decide on exactly how sarcastic he should be to her idiotic question.  Eventually he simply tells her to wait for "go".  I wish he would of been more like he was when he got pissed off at Colby for trying to rush him in Heroes Vs Villains and said something like "wait until I'm ready and say go"!  Probst finally does say "go" and John, Michael and Phillip make it to the next round.
The next round the remaining six have to eat worms that are the oceans version of termites.  Phillip boldly announces that the worms sliminess are really making his mouth water.  But once again Phillip talks the talk but can't walk the walk.  Malcolm and Eddie quickly finish their plate and John just barely beats out Andrea. 
The next round is the classic Survivor dish Balut, which is the incredibly disgusting almost completely developed bird embryo.  Complete with feathers and beaks.  Now after having developed a pretty strong stomach while serving in the Navy for four years I feel I would be great at a Survivor food challenge.  I also think my acting skills are strong enough to where I could convince the other team to pick me in the result of a tie, for the tie breaker, at which point I would blow the competition out of the water, but one thing I would be really worried about having to eat is Balut.  It's the one thing I've seen on Survivor that I don't know if I could even take one bite out of. 
In this particular case Malcolm and John edge out Eddie.  Probst doesn't hesitate to stress how impressed he is to see John in the finals of an immunity challenge.  Who can blame him?  It's not likely to ever happen again.
John ends up winning immunity which isn't so surprising when you stop and consider how many boogers and paste he probably devoured as a kid.  He then does an embarrassing victory dance, the likes of which have not been seen on Survivor since waaaay back in season 1 when Richard Hatch won individual immunity.
Back at camp John is relishing the glory of his victory and confesses his awareness that this is probably the only time he'll get to know this feeling.  This coming from the same guy that was insulted by Ozzy's suggestion that he was the favorite to win the redemption island duel against John in South Pacific.  Of course John did in fact get his ass kicked by Ozzy.
Malcolm is happy for John that he got to cross this achievement off his bucket list but doesn't plan on keeping him around for long which is music to my ears.  After that, what takes place can only be described as the most fascinating displays of Survivor strategy in not only the entire season but probably the decade.
Ok here's the deal.  Most of the "favorites" want to stick to the plan of knocking off the fans, except for Corrine and Malcolm who want to put in motion a mutiny against the "favorites".  So we first we see Phillip and Corrine again calmly discussing their options.  Phillip wants to split the vote against Eddie and Reynold because of their strength while Corrine suggests they take out Sherri because she believes that is safer than splitting the votes, or so she says.  In reality she knows she'll need Reynold and Eddie to implement her master plan of overthrowing the "favorites".  Once again Phillip uses his man crush Boston Rob to strengthen his argument to get rid of the two power players.  This just escalates Corrine's frustration and she goes off to solidify her plan with Reynold and Eddie.
Dawn comes up to her and this is where Corrine makes a fatal error.  She lets it slip that not only does she want to take out Sherri but also is considering turning on Phillip on the next vote and plans on using Reynold and Eddie.  This really spooks Dawn who goes strait to John.  Once again John shows he isn't a total idiot and explains how he doesn't want to show any signs of fractures within the "favorites" thus giving them hope to make a power shift.  If only the first post merge immunity challenge in South Pacific had been a food challenge!  How different that game would of been!  Although he doesn't want to show weakness within the "favs" John sees that Corrine is getting really dangerous and is the biggest threat of weakening his and the "favorites" advantage in the game.  So he and Dawn start devising a plan to get rid of Corrine. 
John goes to work on Andrea who can see the logic in his argument but is worried they don't have the numbers.  They are fairly confident that they can sway Brenda but realize the big question mark is Erik.  Andrea then goes to work on Phillip who is only too happy to vote out Corrine, especially after learning that she's placed a target on his back.  Andrea also works on Erik.  We also see Malcolm working on Erik who acts as though he's with Malcolm but what he's actually going to do is still up in the air even to himself.  Phillip meanwhile goes to work on Sherri.  MAN!  I'm so dizzy!
In yet another confessional by John he also expresses concern that their plan to get out Corrine depends on Erik who has demonstrated in the past a big incompetency to play the game.  Now, I certainly agree that Erik is the dumbest player in Survivor history but I have to take issue with John accusing someone else of demonstrating incompetence as opposed to himself who decided to make the brilliant move of going from sixth place to seventh place the last time he played.  At least Erik finished fifth in his first season.
At the vote there's a lot of tension as a lot of people are nervous about the people they've placed their trust in for this vote, except for Corrine who is completly oblivious as to how much in danger she is in tonight.  Even after she continues to dig her grave by revealing that she's leaving her options open.  When John is asked to respond to this he gives a great response that sounds logical but it also obviously designed not to tip off Corrine that she's getting some votes tonight.
Sherry also plays it smart when asked about the fans prediciment and says she doesn't think the fans have a shot which is complete bullshit but she wants the favorites to feel comfortable.  At the vote reading Corrine has a huge smile on her face when Sherri gets the first five votes but it quickly evoporates when she sees her name come up.  She is totally shocked to see her name come up again and again and AGAIN until she has six votes and Probst reveals the final vote is indeed for her and she is out of the game just like that. Another interesting thing that occurs is Probst doesn't say "first member of the jury".  So with eleven people now left in the game if they do a final three that means there will only be eight people on the jury, if the jury starts with next weeks vote off.  If the jury does start next week we can almost certainly assume that there will in fact be a final three because I don't think they're going to have a final two with nine jury members.  Sorry to see you go Corrine.  You're one of the biggest bitches in Survivor history but you make great comments and next to Brenda you have the best body of the remaining cast.  But this is what you get when you make a big move and your swing vote is the dumbest player in Survivor history!  I have a strong suspicion that that may have been one of the biggest blindsides ever and Corrine probably had no idea what happened until she watched the show back last night.
So it looks like we have a whole new ball game!  It would appear there is a new majority alliance that consists of Phillip, Andrea, Dawn, John, Brenda, Erik and Sherri.  I can't wait to find out what Sherri's Stealth R Us code name is going to be!
With Corrine gone Malcolm is now in serious trouble.  The "favorites" will all most likely turn on him after this weeks events which puts him in a minority alliance of four in a tribe of twelve.  The one thing the pretty boy alliance have going for them is they have both idols and also have the biggest threats to win individual immunity.  However even if they successfully use both idols to vanquish two members from the majority, they are still outnumbered.  Of course if Russell could make that work maybe Malcolm can too, but you also have to remember, that unlike Russell he's in an alliance with people who were not in his original tribe.  If they do make it to the final five there's a much bigger chance of them turning on him then Russell's alliance from Samoa.  So I hate to say it but it looks like Malcolm's chances of winning this game have gone to slim to none.
On the other side of the coin there's Sherri who definitely benefited the most from tonight's vote.  In one episode Sherri's fate has been seriously altered for the better.  She went from being on the chopping block and just two votes shy of leaving the game to being a member of a majority alliance.  Not only that, but given the fact that she's the only fan in this alliance that now makes her the swing vote, which is one of the best spots to be in within the game of Survivor.  If she can dodge Malcolm and Reynold's immunity idols over the next couple weeks she's in a very good position to become the most powerful player in the game.
I do have to say I'm very impressed at the number of bullets Reynold and Eddie have managed to dodge so you never know what's going to happen.  This season has suddenly become very interesting.

NEXT WEEK ON SURVIVOR!  Malcolm knows he's on thin ice and makes a plea to.... Dawn?  If history is any indication she's not the best person to place your trust in!  So I'm guessing Malcolm's position is only going to get worse next week.