I've said it before and I'll say it again. Survivor is like pizza and sex. Even when it's bad it's still pretty good. This season and this finale definitely proved that. I would of been happy with three of the final five members winning but unfortunately it was not to be.
Although not a great one as far as Survivor finales go, it does start off with a lot of excitement but also a lot of disappointment when Erik, one of my three picks, collapses immediately after last week's vote. And I do mean IMMEDIATELY! It doesn't even take place after a long hike back to camp but happens right after the tribe is exiting tribal council. Medical comes in and determines he's severely dehydrated and malnourished. Thanks Brandon. You took away your tribes food supply and now your best buddy is at death's door. (Of course I'm STILL wondering what happened to all that rice and beans that Andrea won!)
The doctor is able to administer an IV on sight. After Erik asks what this will do something even more shocking happens. Probably the most shocking event of the entire season when village idiot Eddie gives a very clear and articulate explanation of what's happening with Erik and how the IV will benefit him.
Probst asks for a verdict as to whether Erik can stay in the game. Unfortunately the doctor says Erik's condition is so severe he need to be hospitalized immediately. It's no surprise when John and Dawn waist no time to clamor for Erik's vote. I've never seen such a phoney and disgusting display of manipulation and fake displays of affection. Dawn is like "I love you! Blah blah", then she snatches Erik's bag so she can hand it to him while he's being whisked away by the van, however she doesn't go into full crybaby mode and for once holds back a major meltdown.
I have to say I'm a little disappointed in Erik. It's obvious he was in a lot of pain but I can't imagine there would be any amount of pain that would keep me out of the game at any stage but ESPECIALLY at the final five! If I'm conscious and that close to the end they would have to literally drag me kicking and screaming. However, Erik does no such thing and he ends up finishing fifth place just like he did last time and just like last time he goes out with a very good chance of winning had he been able to make it just a couple more days.
So now we're down to two "favorites" and two fans, two guys, two girls and it would seem that the game is now Eddie's to lose. There is now just one more immunity challenge left and out of the other three his biggest competition is probably Dawn. John realizes this and makes a bee line for Eddie to negotiate a deal as soon as they get back to camp. Of course it's one he has no intention of honoring should he be put in that position.
At the reward Probst calls the players in and Dawn and everyone else have somehow managed to get over the tragedy of losing Erik and come in smiling ear to ear, fake teeth and all! The challenge is a redo of the last immunity challenge that Ozzy won during his Survivor career. This happened in Dawn and John's season but they were out of the game at that point so they have no advantage of experience with the challenge. In case you forgot you have to build a tower of cards while holding onto a pully that is connected to the base of the cards. However, this challenge is not for immunity like in South Pacific. Like the last "reward" challenge last season this challenge is for a chance to win and advantage in the final immunity challenge. Boy they're really gettin desperate on the kinds of twists they add to a season. This one is so lame. I also really miss the days when castaways got to play for a car.
The challenge itself is pretty riveting. I've never seen a challenge go back and forth so many times in Survivor history. At one point Eddie is just inches from winning, which would almost certainly result in a spot in the final three and probably the title of sole survivor. Unfortunately he loses concentration (what a shock) and knocks over his tower. Both Dawn and Sherri come close to winning a few times as well but Sherri in particular is so nervous she can't make it to the finish line. After all the times John knocks over his tower I'm fairly certain he's not winning this but to my surprise he pulls himself together and does indeed win the challenge. Naturally, as soon as he wins Dawn rushes over to him and congratulates him to try to stay in his good graces. Of course I'm sure she was being totally sincere and NEVER would of done that if Sherri or Eddie had won the challenge!
After the challenge were subjected to John once again bragging about what a great challenge beast he is. Then amazingly we suddenly stop seeing John being buddy buddy with Eddie. Then something even more amazing happens when it becomes clear that the final four are completely oblivious to just how hated Dawn is by the jury. I'm not surprised that Dawn fails to realize this but Sherri and John not seeing this is very unexpected. Now suddenly Sherri and Eddie are buddy after a month of hating each other.
Dawn of course is completely paranoid about being voted out. She pleads to John for his assurances. To her face he completely reassures her but in private he's implying that he might want to cut her loose, which I really can't understand. That would be like wanting to cut Russell loose at the final five.
On day 38 the tribe gets tree mail that informs them of the impending right of passage of fallen comrades which will be followed by the final immunity challenge. There are some pretty amusing remarks by the four during this stage. We hear Sherri say how Shamar was "misunderstood". Ok. Then we hear Dawn accusing Brandon of letting his personal life affect his game too much. Alrighty then. Reminds me of when Brandon's uncle was crying about getting lied to. Then we hear Matt give the incredibly insightful remark that Survivor is one of the hardest games there is. Gee thanks a lot. I never knew Survivor was a hard game. Hard to believe such an insightful braniac failed to make it to the merge! Then John talks about how grateful he is to of been under Phillips "tutelage" and I really want to smack John. Then we get a soundbite from Phillip where he takes one last opportunity to swoon over his idol Boston Rob!
At the end we hear Eddie boasting about how he is ready really bring it home at the challenge despite John's advantage, because he's done so great in individual challenges so far this season. The challenge consists of running up a three story tower and retrieving three bags that are tied up and contain puzzle pieces. They must then propel themselves down a slide and when they have all three bags they must untie them and form a puzzle that's in the shape of a flame. Before the challenge begins John's advantage is revealed which is having bags that are already untied.
Naturaly John is the first to start on his puzzle but the rest of the pack aren't far behind. Eddie really needs to win this but unfortunately the fireman is more accustomed to destroying fires rather than creating them and he doesn't even come close, even if its just a depiction of a fire. Both Dawn and Sherri actually pull ahead of John at first but then, just like the last challenge John pulls it together and is able to win the challenge. Watch out John! If you're not careful you're going to be knocked over by Dawn who is rushing over to you for a very disingenuous congratulatory hug!
The odds are really against Eddie now but he gives it the old college try to plead his case to vote out Dawn. Although his case is weak he actually does a pretty good job with his argument. Sherri has nothing to worry about because John is convinced she can't win. The question is does she still want Dawn out and is she willing to force a tie if John isn't convinced of that strategy.
At tribal Dawn talks about how Eddie is a huge threat because he hasn't pissed anyone off. Probst gives Eddie the opportunity to retort and Eddie is like "duhhhhh". With a little more prodding by Probst he finally gets an actual sentence of out Einstein, who agrees with Dawn that the jury doesn't hate him but probably don't respect his game since he only voted out one person. Remarkably he never mentions the deal John made with him.
Predictably, John and everybody else play it smart and vote out Eddie. Naturally, as soon as this happens, Dawn jumps up, hugs Eddie and tells him how much she's gonna miss him. I'm sure. What's interesting about this is Sherri's vote. She was very vocal about her apprehension in going against Dawn in the final three, although I have no idea why. I'm guessing John realized long before tribal council that Eddie was too dangerous to bring to the end and probably warned her against voting for Dawn. In his confessional Eddie states that Sherri has a zero percent chance of winning so it's painfully obvious that John is going to win.
Never the less we have to still go through the motions of the day 39 breakfast and preparing for the final tribal. Reflecting on her chances of winning Dawn states that's there a part of her that thinks she doesn't deserve to do good. Well that's at least a little reassuring. At least Dawn is completely evil if there's a part of her that realizes she is in fact a total scumbag.
At the final tribal, Dawn is the first to give her opening statement. She seems enormously proud of herself and is completely unaware of cold stares she's receiving from the jury. She tries to defend her behavior in the game by saying since Survivor is football she had to be willing to tackle. Survivor IS football? I was never aware that Survivor IS football. Go figure. I guess you learn something new everyday.
Sherri is next and is so nervous she just starts babbling complete nonsense which includes talking about how well off financially she is, making it more and more obvious that John has this in the bag, even though he is also very nervous and like Sherri he verbalizes this. It's hard to believe he was never told in Harvard Law School to never say you're nervous when speaking in public and you should fake it until you make it. However, he gives the most logical opening and all of his answers are also very logical and persuasive. They're also complete horseshit in a lot of cases. He tells Malcolm that he was able to make it to the end because he's so much more insecure than Malcolm and he assures Eddie that he will be happy to share a beer at the bar with the amigos after the game. Of course he doesn't tell them how just a few weeks earlier he was saying how he would never want to engage in any kind of tom foolery with those muscle heads. John is a big fan of the game and knows what kind of questions are typically asked. I'm pretty sure he planned on giving that insecurity answer to any of the amigos who might ask it.
The jury is of course, very hard on Dawn, although there not as damaging as the heroes vs villains jury was to Russell which was a disappointment. She consistently says how she was just playing the game when she betrayed people who were strategic threats, but I would of loved to have heard someone ask her how she would of felt had John decided to do that to her.
The two best are Reynold and Brenda. I've been waiting and waiting and waiting for someone to call Dawn out on being such a phony and Reynold hits it right on the head. He talks about her always being the first one to give an over emphatic hug and to say "that's hilarious" when someone makes a joke but she's not even laughing, which I thought was very observant.
As Reynold is telling her this Dawn is acting completely shocked by these accusations and claims she has no idea she is the least bit phony. I think up until this point Dawn believed, and maybe still does, that she's perceived by everyone to be this incredibly noble and caring person. While there probably are a few dimwits out there that think this, or maybe I should say "thought" but of course it isn't true. I'm pretty amazed that Dawn can't see Reynold's point but the funny thing is I think she was being sincere when she claimed ignorance of this character flaw she has. To me, this is just further proof of just how truly insane Dawn actually is.
Micheal seems to be a little bit more sympathetic to Dawn. He asks John if he thinks all the heat she's getting is warranted. John dodges a strait answer by saying he doesn't know, but he's happy to see so much venom directed towards Dawn. Of course he wasn't asked what he knows he was asked what he thinks so it would of been nice if John had actually answered what he thought instead of saying he didn't know. Upon hearing this Dawn gives a very sarcstic "thanks Cochran" like she's surprise he would be happy that the jury hates her.
Then of course, there's Brenda and they save the best for last. First she gets Dawn to admit that she would not of actually quit the game like she claimed if Brenda had not found her teeth, then Brenda demands Dawn prove it by taking her teeth out and letting everyone see her the way Brenda saw her that day. At first she refuses but quickly flip flops and says she'll be "happy to humiliate herself" for Brenda and actually does it! We then get a great money shot of Dawn flashing her tooth challenged smile. I don't know why Dawn did this. It should of been clear to her at this point that she had no chance of winning so she had nothing to gain by doing so.
The backlash Dawn received was no surprise but I was very surprised by how hard Sherri was attacked by the jury. Malcolm basically tells her there's no way she's getting his vote. Phillip excommunicates her from Stealth R Us, while Erik and Eddie both accuse her of doing nothing. I think this was very unfair of the jury. I will admit that that "paybacks a bitch" comment she made after Corrine got voted out was really dumb, but Sherri was put into an impossible situation at the merge. Her original tribe was outnumbered 2 to 1 and everyone on her original tribe hated her.
The fact that she made it to the final three is nothing short of a miracle! I'm sure if you went up to Erik or Eddie or Malcolm and asked them what chance someone would have who was in that situation, of making it to the final three they probably would of answered that that person would have to play the game of a lifetime to make it to the final three. It would of been extremely stupid of Sherri to try and make some big strategic moves right after the merge. She did the smart thing and wormed herself into the majority alliance and then made a strong sub alliance with John and Dawn. I was really hoping Sherri would win this game and I believe she's much more deserving than John. Maybe she did some really stupid mistakes in her interactions with the jury that we never saw but I just don't get the hatred that is directed at her. I think in the case of Phillip he probably made some advances toward her and was rebuffed so he is very bitter about that.
So John wins and he wins by unanimous decision. This is pretty shocking. Given the fact that he betrayed all the same people Dawn did and with his inherent hatred of Alpha males which made up about half the jury, it would seem Sherri should of been able to win this, but she doesn't get a single vote, which unfortunately means Dawn gets to tie her for second place.
How did this happen?
Well, the first time John played, most of the cast were really annoyed by his eccentric personality. For some reason everybody this season seemed to find it very endearing. Never in all my years of watching this show have I ever seen a game fall into place so perfectly for one person. He was never in danger of being voted off. His tribe dominated before the merge than at the swap even though his tribe lost every challenge he had the numbers to stay safe. Then after the merge he always had the numbers. So John becomes only the second male to win a season that featured returning players. He's still a nerd though.
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